The Tale of the Toxic Taters

So I consider myself to be a pretty good baker, and a decent cook.  I can make a few things REALLY well for dinner, and I'm getting better since I've been trying new recipes from   www.cookinglight.com.  BTW, their herbed chicken parmesan made my husband fall in love with me all over again.  


Anyway, the problem with me is that it usually takes me screwing a recipe up at least once before I get it right.  Apparently I have a problem reading recipes.  For instance, a few months ago, I was making these delicious maple date bars cause my hubby and I were going through a serious "I love dates more than ice cream" phase, and I misread ONE word on the recipe.  It actually says
 "Beat sugar and Butter at medium speed" after the first step.  I read it as 
"Beat IN sugar and butter at medium speed."
To all of you cooks out there, that tiny two-letter word makes a BIG difference.  The bars turned out delicious anyway, but the consistency was all wrong (truthfully, Jordan want me to make them "wrong" every time--out of pride I have to do it right at least once though).


Or the time that I made two pumpkin pies the night before our first Thanksgiving without pumpkin pie spice, had a nervous breakdown, and my man went and got me more pie stuff so I could make two more the right way.

I have had my share of successes though.  This last Easter Sunday was a complete triumph (jordan's word I swear).  

And, for dessert we had chocolate parfaits.  I've already mentioned Jord's love for chicken parm, and we also thoroughly enjoy chocolate chip cookies on occasion. 


A few nights ago, though, I was having one of those days and was, shall we say, craving a little comfort food.  So I had my heart set on pork chops with mashed potatoes.  I LOVE mashed potatoes.  So, I got myself going on dinner, so that Jord could eat before rehearsal.  I am still working on getting all the food that I make ready at the same time, so, of course, I had to put the pork chops and gravy in the microwave to keep warm while the potatoes finished boiling.  After I drained them, I remembered that I only had one mixing bowl in the apartment, and that it was currently being used to house Jordan's award winning salsa.  Hmm.  What to do?


I decided to just mix them with a hand mixer in the pot I cooked them in.  No problem.  I got it done and served up, and just as Jordan was about to take a big fatty bite, I noticed some suspicious pepper flecks in our creamy taters.  Wait a second...  I didn't pepper these....


Yep.  The hand mixer had scraped the teflon from the pan into my food, making them poisonous.  WHY??!!!!  Luckily, neither of us ate any.  But, I was totally distraught.  I started crying like I had cancer of the puppy and felt like I really couldn't do anything right.  It seems over the top now, but, it really was devastating.  After calming down a little, my amazing husband took me out for some frozen yogurt and suggested that we watch Clueless.


Its okay.  You can be jealous.  :)